sevenswells: (Default)
Finally, this is my "His Last Vow" review, full of swearing and spoilers. Anyone is welcome to debate it, because if I missed something I want to know and I want to understand what the fuck was going on in this episode.


Last warning: SPOILERS for His Last Vow (also lots and lots of swearing) )

You know what? After all is said and done, I love hiatus. I love this fandom, I love its theories, I love its crack, I love its art, manips, vids, meta, fanfictions that are so much better than the original material. Yes there are crazy annoying people in it but those people would be crazy and annoying with or without the show, whereas what the fans express as love (and not hate) in this fandom is unique and beautiful and to me shines better and brighter than anything else in the world.
And now I can say I probably enjoy the hiatus between each season more than I enjoy the show.
I love you, Sherlock fandom, and this is all that matters in the end.

P.S.: and you, Mystrade shippers, are the most ADORABLE shippers this side of the galaxy
sevenswells: (Spike bitch please (Buffy TVS))
So, yeah, I saw Prometheus. Suffice to say I was not pleased.

Prometheus

Please don't tell me that the film "brings more questions than answers" and that I didn't understand its point. It's not about the "metaphysical" questions that don't find answers, it's about basic common logic that just doesn't work in the plot. There are movies that are supposed to be a bit obscure and provoke questions and thoughts, and then there's just shoddy writing. Guess in which category Prometheus falls in.

Rant continues under the cut )



And this review by Maddox, you don't even have the complete list all the plotholes and incoherences and logic!fails contained in Prometheus. I swear, I could list even more of them. God.

I don't understand this era we live in. No, honestly, I don't. This crap, a prequel to The Thing, a remake of Total Recall... Why? Is our age the doom of pop culture? Where we keep repeating stuff and make it less interesting that it was?

sevenswells: (Oh my God it's full of penises)
I'm a bit sick of people whining bitterly (particularly on Dumblr) about how Sherlock fans are only interested in porn and slash.
That is not true. Not that there's anything wrong with being only interested in porn and slash in my opinion, but it is. Not. True.
I'll be the first to admit that I love my porn. Most of my rec posts contain fics where Sherlock and John are going at it like rabbits, because I'm a sexual being, and that's the prism with which I view the world; I won't apologize for it.
But as it turns out, my favourite fic in the whole fandom is [livejournal.com profile] rosa_acicularis 's The Anatomist. It's wonderfully written, it's not centered on a romantic relationship, there is no porn in it and not even hints of Sherlock/John. And I'm the biggest porn enthusiast and romantic schmoop I know. Go figure.
I can't even think of one fandom where people won't ask for moar porn in their comments and where porny fics are not more popular than plotty ones.
But I think we're actually doing fairly well in the Sherlock fandom. It's not perfect, I guess no fandom is, but it really is not that bad.
There are dark fics, casefics, funny comedy fics with no romantic relationship whatsoever, fics where Sherlock is 100% asexual and not touching John one bit -- or anyone else for that matter... and I know for a fact that some of them are quite popular, too. Like it or not, there is diversity in the Sherlock fandom, maybe more than in some others. Of course there is a crushing majority of Sherlock/John slash (and I'm the first to support it), but I don't agree with the picture those bitter fans are depicting where there is absolutely no place or recognition for anything else.
In this fandom, I wrote one fic where there was S/J porn (after several paragraphs of idiotic comedy involving spray bottles and giant crabs), one fic that was mainly about food with a bit of slash in the end with nothing more explicit than a kiss between Sherlock and John, one fic about Mycroft's brotherly relationship to Sherlock with a mini-squinty hint at a possible romantic relationship between Sherlock and John, and one ficlet about nothing in particular, just Sherlock and John drinking tea on New Year's Day.
I consider that they all got a good deal of appreciation from readers, each at their own level, and I didn't even get one comment about making any of the ones that didn't contain sex "more porny", and I didn't feel any underlying frustration in any comment either.
So I don't know what the people who complain about that are actually doing, but maybe, MAYBE they're doing it wrong, and it has nothing to do with rabidly horny fans looking desperately for slash and porn everywhere.

Sorry about the rant, but I got really annoyed in ways I didn't even expect and I had to write about it.
sevenswells: (This is not Sparta I am lost)
A y est, enfin, je viens de finir A Dance With Dragons.

Globalement, je trouve qu'il s'est payé un peu notre binette, le Martin. Il ne se passe rien dans les trois-quarts du bouquin, ça commence à s'accélérer un peu vers la fin, mais bon sans vraiment de coup de pression non plus, et juste quand il commence vraiment à se passer des trucs, il nous laisse les couilles bleues et la queue entre les doigts en nous claquant la porte au nez. Mais quelle pute.

Gros gros spoilers pour ceux qui ont pas lu ADWD )
Voilou.
sevenswells: (Shut up you were thinking it's annoying)
So recently there's been a few (a lot) of crossover fanarts Sherlock/The Phantom of the Opera. I have to say, I am horrified.


Why do people like the Phantom's character? Why do people think it's a "beautiful love story"? I don't get it. The same people might shun Twilight because the main female character gets repeatedly abused by the main male character who's a total dick, which is true, but they don't see that the Phantom of the Opera is the exact same shit -- no, actually it's even worse.


The Phantom is a murderer, a psychopath, a blackmailer, a stalker, a kidnapper, a thief, a terrorist -- there is absolutely no redeeming quality about him, he's as ugly on the inside as he is on the outside. If Christine feels any love for him, then she must have developed some serious Stockholm syndrome. Granted he taught her how to sing, but that just gave him a Pygmalion complex and he thinks he owns her, because of course he would also be jealous and possessive on top of it all. What a cock.


Then there's the Quasimodo complex. Why do beautiful women must absolutely fall in love with ugly men who love them? Why do they have to make the special effort to "see their inner beauty"? Because if Esmeralda doesn't love Quasimodo back, well then she's a superficial bitch. Throughout countless stories, ugly guys force their love upon beautiful women and those women are supposed to do all the work and appreciate their personality in return and overcome the ugliness that they see. While those guys certainly didn't fall for said women because they liked their conversation and wits in the first place.
Although Quasimodo did have, supposedly, a pure, beautiful soul inside a monstrous body. Which, again, is completely NOT the case with the Phantom.
And what if the Phantom was an ugly woman instead of a man? An ugly, murdering, thieving, stalking (etc etc) woman who kidnaps and mind-fucks a handsome male singer? I'm pretty sure nobody would have found excuses for her and thought that their "love story" was "beautiful".



What is it about the Phantom of the Opera, seriously?

WAIT, WHAT

Aug. 3rd, 2011 11:17 pm
sevenswells: (Pixel Sherlock's favourite word)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN "NEW SERIES NEXT YEAR", VOICE OVER MAN?????

NO

JUST NO

FUCK YOU BEEB

YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO US

I HATE YOU

I HATE YOU SFM

Pffffff

Jun. 15th, 2011 12:08 pm
sevenswells: (Puckzilla does not approve (Glee))
We finished watching the last episodes of the second season of Glee yesterday, merely out of obstination and in order to get some sense of closure -- we really didn't want to. It's safe to say now that I won't be watching season 3.
That second season was very bad. Some good ideas here and there, sometimes one good episode that cruelly gave us hope, but overall, poor writing, poor song choice and interpretations, and guys, sorry to tell you, but ALL your "original songs" SUCKED big time. The New York one made us howl with second-hand embarrassment. And just as we thought we couldn't be more unimpressed, bam, last episode, complete anti-climax that left us wondering what the hell it was we saw in that show in the first place, whether there ever *was* something charming, fresh, new that made us fall in love with it or if it was just wishful thinking and total delusion on our part.
The only thing good about that last episode was Usher's Yeah! sung by unknown female choir that looked a lot like the Jane Addams girls, but I guess they had to cut the performance in half because they didn't want the viewers to realize how inferior New Directions' performance would be compared to it (too late, ha!).
I also enjoyed watching lovely (and gay as ever) Jonathan Groff's comeback, "Rolling in the deep" was also one of the good songs that I'll remember from those horrible last episodes.

Fortunately after that, Kiri had the good idea to show us NPH's performance at the Tony Awards and we gained back some faith in humanity and show tunes. This has probably been reblogged over and over all around the Internetz, but I don't care, here is my own reblog of that fabulous awesome piece of epicness:

NPH FTW )
sevenswells: (Spike bitch please (Buffy TVS))
OH GOD THAT MOVIE MADE ME SO ANGRY.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME I WAS ANGRY LIKE THAT IN A CINEMA... WAIT, IT WAS WHEN I SAW KICK-ASS WHICH WAS ALSO A TURD. And it's the same director: I guess this explains that.
I have now identified my enemy. Matthew Vaughn, I will find you. I will find you and I will make you suffer. I don't know how or when, just know that I'm coming to get you, and you will pay for those long, very long hours of my life spent on that useless piece of shit you dare call a movie.
WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO BE A FILM DIRECTOR WHEN YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO *FILM* CORRECTLY?? How, just HOW can you get, in this day and age, camera angles so WRONG that they make every single fucking scene look flat, devoid of any dramatic tension, and ridiculous to the point of no return? Is that some kind of super power? Seriously, how do you do it?

I'm nerdy and all, but I don't give a fuck about the original X-Men licence. I'm an occasional X-Men fan, nothing more. So I can say that X-Men First Class was the worst movie of the year without just being a bitter fangirl disappointed by the adaptation. In fact I had no expectations whatsoever about it, so I couldn't possibly be disappointed. And still... within the first fifteen minutes I wanted to get the fuck out of the cinema screaming and pulling my hair off. IT WAS SO BADLY FILMED AND WRITTEN. EVEN THE TWILIGHT MOVIES WERE BETTER DIRECTED AND THAT'S SAYING SOMETHING.

And no, I didn't care for the slashy undertones. Magneto, played by some cheap version of Viggo Mortensen, was a dumbass with the charisma of a plastic fork making stupid derpfaces whenever he used his powers, and Xavier was a spineless (pun not intended) jerk, not even interesting enough for me to find appropriate insults to define him. So no thanks, I don't want to read about any kind of romance between those two.

Give me back Ian McKellen and Patrick Stewart, and the hours of my life I've wasted watching that fucking trainwreck.
sevenswells: (Nodame French!?)
Spoilers for Top Chef season 8 up until ep 9 )
sevenswells: (Spike bitch please)
Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, Glee bitching coming your way.

Right under the cut )
sevenswells: (Oh shit it's Monday)
I DO NOT like Curtis's new bitch. She's a horrible character, and I can't understand why the writers of Misfits would render the other female characters completely useless only to add such an irritating character to the mix.

And I generally don't like this second season, which is a lot less well-written than the first. There are some good things, good ideas, but as a whole, it's rather a disappointment.

So, with every last drop of my usual arrogance, here's how I would have made Misfits better:

Spoilerific up until 2x04 )

Also, I would have made Nathan gay for Simon fer reals.

...Just sayin'.
sevenswells: (Puckzilla does not approve)
What the fuck, Ryan Murphy. What the hell was this fuckery about?

Am I the only one to think that this week's GLEE episode was a total travesty, pun more or less intended? Man it SUCKED!

Rant, and spoils of episode 1x20, Theatricality )
sevenswells: (Puckzilla does not approve)
I hate debates about fanfiction and whether it's legal or not - especially when those debates are conducted by the fans themselves. There's usually a lot of self-loathing involved, and most of the fangirls I know generally go : "we shouldn't, we really shouldn't be doing this, what we're doing is illegal, I know it's illegal, okay? I'm an outlaw and a bad person" - and the only thing I want to say to that is "STFU and enjoy your fucking self, idiot, because nobody cares about your guilt and nobody's gonna arrest and sue you". But now one of my favourite authors ever writes crap about fan fiction, and I just can't remain quiet.

Bitching ahead )

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